I am runner, hear me roar

I have a quote next to my desk at work that says:

I run because somehow completely exhausting myself is the most relaxing part of my day.

On many, many days, that is a completely accurate statement.

I did not start running until I was maybe 37. I was on the cross-country team as a teenager, but I don’t really count that because I didn’t love it then. When I was 37, I started running with a friend. We decided to do one of those “couch to 5K” apps and it was easy and fun and we did it, we ran a 5K. And it was exhilarating. And then we decided to sign up for a half-marathon and we trained and we did it, we ran a half marathon.

As I have an internal setting that always seems to be set to “more,” I decided I needed to run a marathon. I signed up for a running group, but quit after a couple of weeks because it just felt sort of competitive and I really like the solitary time that running gives me. I was supposed to be training for a marathon in February, but as I had also just gone back to college (after 20-ish years) and was planning to get married in December, something just had to give and it just had to be the training. Finally, I signed up for the 2015 Austin Marathon and started training in September of 2014. I found an online training guide and it’s not rocket science, you just increase your mileage every week or so until it’s time for the marathon in February. It was so exciting to run farther and farther each week. I guess you’d think it would be boring to run for hours and hours, but I found that after about mile 10, my mind would just be in this really cool zoned out and relaxed state and I played great music on my iPod.

In January, I managed to pull something in my calf and it was very painful. I could not run at all. I couldn’t believe all of the training would be for nothing. We went to Akumal, Mexico on vacation and I didn’t run the whole time. I tried not to worry about it, but I was nervous that it was something serious. Miraculously though, by the time we got home, it was hurting much less and so I slowly got back into training, being very careful not to hurt it again.

February 15, 2015 arrived and I don’t know how I wasn’t even nervous. I was just going for a run, that was it. A very long run. If you are physically able to do so, I would suggest that anyone and everyone run a marathon. It is one of the most amazing things you can ever do. I mean sure you could like rescue orphan rhinos from poachers and stuff like that, but this is probably safer and is still pretty cool. Imagine approximately four hours of continuous cheering and applause. Do you know how good that makes you feel? I had 12 friends and family come out to watch along the 26.2 mile route. Some even showed up at several different locations. My friend, Ewa, even ran the last 11 miles with me for morale support. I felt so loved and so accomplished by the time I was done. I ran a marathon! Me! I was an overweight trainwreck for years and I ran a marathon!

I ran the 2016 marathon as well and it was almost as good, but not quite as good as that first time. I don’t know if I’ll do it again. It’s a possibility.

I know people say you should cross-train and how that’s better for you and all of that and I am sure that is true, but I do not like bicycling. My legs don’t like to move that way and the seat hurts my butt. I like being in a pool OK, but actual swimming is not fun for me. I don’t like putting my face in the water. It makes me claustrophobic. Walking is fine, but it’s not quite the same rush. I like yoga, but my favorite part is Shavasana and that’s just not very aerobic. Roller blading is so 1980’s. I like the elliptical machine, but it’s boring after a while (well unless you have an extra good People magazine about actual celebrities and not just reality TV “stars”). I do lift weights with Randeen on Fridays and that is really great so at least I mix it up a little bit.

But running is what I love the most.  It is my meditation, my sanctuary, my antidepressant, my hobby, my exercise. When I went back to college, I could almost write my papers in my head as I ran a few miles in the morning. Something about running sort of re-sets my thinking in a way that I can figure things out. It also gets all of those good brain chemicals working so I can behave like an actual human being during the day instead of a lunatic (OK sometimes that still happens, but it’s less likely to happen when I’ve run a few miles). I am not fast by any means, but it doesn’t even matter when I’m out there. It makes me feel strong.

Summers are tough here in Austin. It is hot. My body and brain don’t like running in the heat. So I take more breaks and I try to go really early in the morning. Sometimes the treadmill is OK, but it isn’t quite the same and have you ever seen someone fall off a treadmill? Holy crap! That terrifies me. But then comes autumn and I’m like a frisky puppy. I have energy return that hibernated all summer. It’s the best. And you can run the entire winter save maybe one or two ice days. Spring is beautiful as well (hence the one person moving to Austin every 42 flipping minutes because they visit in March and think we have perfect weather…wait until August!).

I run most days the same route at home, but changing it up is fun too. In Paris, I’ve run from Ile Saint-Louis, down the Seine, up the Champs Elysees to the Arc de Triomphe and then to the Eiffel Tower and back. In Italy, I’ve run through tiny villages around Lake Como. In Scotland, I’ve run down Loch Long and Gare Loch to Helensburgh. In London, I’ve run up and down the canal in Kensal Green. In Northern California, I’ve run through redwood forests and on trails right next to the Pacific Ocean (I saw whales!). In Savannah, Georgia, I ran multiple times around Forsyth Park. In Madison, Wisconsin, I ran around Lake Monona. My favorite run is down the Animas River Trail in Durango, Colorado. The weather there is always perfect and it is my happy place.

I used to run almost every day and now that’s just not possible. I don’t sleep well and my body gets fatigued easier. On days that I miss, I am getting better about not losing my mind over it. It’s not that I feel guilty, I just miss the fulfillment I get from it. It makes me happy and why wouldn’t you want to do something that makes you happy every single day? But you know I didn’t know at 37 that I would love running so much so maybe there are some other things out there for me to become passionate about and that will make me just as happy. That’s a pretty exciting thought.